Dili - president and evil mastermind
Hometown: Southern Rim of the Lake of Fire
Favorite Player: Marouane Chamakh
Favorite Arsenal Moment: League Cup Final, 2011
How You Came to Love Arsenal: After I absorbed the soul of Stan Kroenke in 2007, I decided to look into his business interests.
Top 3 Hobbies: Afflicting the weak, amassing minions, ruling over all I see
Favorite Thing About Chicago Gooners: How easily they bow to my wishes
Matt - vices president
Hometown: Bag End
Favorite Player: Gervinho
Favorite Arsenal Moment: The 1972 Centenary FA Cup Final
How You Came to Love Arsenal: My dad's family is from Leeds, so Arsenal was a natural choice.
Top 3 Hobbies: Avarice, Gluttony, Sloth
Favorite Thing About Chicago Gooners: They give me many chances to indulge in vices throughout the year.
TOMMY - BARFLY
Favorite Player: Sébastien Squillaci
Favorite Arsenal Moment: That one guy scored a pretty sweet goal that one time.
How You Came to Love Arsenal: I like beer. They said I could drink beers in the morning if I watched the Arsenal. Now I drink beers in the morning.
Top 3 Hobbies: crocheting, croquet, and croquettes
Favorite Thing About Chicago Gooners: They make my own alcoholism seem less raging.
meredith - disciplinarian
Age: A Gentleman never asks, and a Lady never tells
Hometown: No fixed abode
Favorite Player: André Santos
Favorite Arsenal Moment: Arsenal v Stoke - Feb 27, 2010
How You Came to Love Arsenal: To spite my Spurs-loving ex
Top 3 Hobbies: Smoking, intimidating men, ham radio
Favorite Thing About Chicago Gooners: I'm more normal than half of them.
ian - web slinger
Age: Can play anything from 25 to 40, really
Hometown: 4 Privet Drive
Favorite Player: Kim Källström
Favorite Arsenal Moment: Any time Wenger tries to zip his coat
How You Came to Love Arsenal: I wandered into the Globe on my way back from a bar early on a Saturday and found out I could keep partying if I started watching Arsenal.
Top 3 Hobbies: Water polo, Glockenspiel, Topiaries
Favorite Thing About Chicago Gooners: I never had many friends growing up. Now I have lots of people who I watch sports with. I guess they're kind of like friends?
Madison - philanthropy queen
Age: Older every day
Hometown: Here and there, mostly
Favorite Player: About Diaby
Favorite Arsenal Moment: That 2012 League Cup match against Bradford City
How You Came to Love Arsenal: While acknowledging the cold, meaningless existence we call life, I like the idea of a club that can't seem to make it past the Champions League round of 16.
Top 3 Hobbies: Ukulele, Dominoes (the game), Dominoes (the pizza)
Favorite Thing About Chicago Gooners: If I get up early, get drunk, and yell at my TV on my own, I'm insane. With these people I'm part of something that's collectively less insane.